Friday, September 2, 2016

Day 8 &9- struggle bus

Being on my own during the day has been very lonely. And I've been a human puddle for both of these days. Even though I can breathe perfectly normal and didn't have the upper jaw surgery I had a terrible bloody nose on Tuesday. It all started because I got frustrated with my eating situation. you know just one of those I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE MOMENTS.

Well and they tell you after the surgery to not blow your nose for one month- well avoid crying too. Crying with your mouth forced shut is difficult and actually forces you blow your nose without even trying. Well all my crying started a bloody nose and as I kid I was prone to bloody noses and they would happen all the time. But having a bloody nose with your mouth wired shut isn't fun either. It bled for probably 30-45 minutes and since I'm home alone I decided to call my mom who lives 2 hours away and then have her call my boyfriend to come home and make sure I am okay. So now I can't eat like a normal person and I can't even express my emotions like a normal person for fear of a bloody nose. I HATE MY FACE RIGHT NOW.

I guess if you're reading this, prepare for bad days because they'll happen. And find some recipes of blended food you like. I'm feeling sick of fruit and veggie smoothies but am having hard time dealing with the mental part of eating a normally solid food in liquid form. Beans and hotdogs blended....smells the same and tastes the same but feels wrong on so many levels.

No comments:

Post a Comment